If you’re reading this, you already know who I am. But this time, I’ll describe myself not by the what I’ve used in the past.
I travel to study the behaviour and madness that are birds. I visit areas where few people have been, seen animals that some could never dream of, and understand how Mother Nature is absolutely amazing. I have lived in a tent for months on end. I enjoy the luxury of a bed but I sleep best in a sleep bag, in a tent, or just underneath the stars. Although the cold hurts my fingers and toes beyond description, and extreme heat makes heat rash that’s almost unbearable, I’ll sacrifice my comfort to see nature at it’s finest. Nature is the cure all for when you can’t take it anymore. The sunshine, the rain and the smell of dirt can bring you back to center and heal your body and heart. I know I sound all hippy-dippy, but I believe it 100%.
I used live my life in my safe little box. I used to let food control my life. I used to think I had to be a certain number on a scale and size in the pant department. I used to think I had to be fit and skinny all the same time. I used to think I was not good enough for anyone or anything and simply went along with the strokes of life to see how it would all end up. But then I opened up that box and let everything take me away. I realized one summer when I lost control that things don’t always work out the way you want it to and that believing the worst gets you no where. I learned that people judge less than you have been made to believe, are more accepting and love you for who you are. I realized who my real friends were and how my life in that little box had kept me from being there for them and them for me.
I never thought writing would be such a huge part of my life. I realized that over the years I have filled countless journals, notebooks, post its and a previous blog with all my happiness and hardships. I write when I’m excited; I write when I’m sad. Sometime I’m frustrated or angry, but sometimes I just can’t contain myself with my feel good vibes. I have never been a talker and therefore a writer, and I believe it has helped me through some of the toughest times, and continues to do so up to this very second (hence…this new blog). I never thought I would be a writer because I always felt I had such a limited vocabulary, but sometimes it’s not about the words you use…just how you use them. I write so I can come back, read my thoughts again, and gain another perspective…or realize how crazy I must be. And here, hopefully my writing will bring you some happy tears of laughter.
But the greatest thing as of yet…is realizing that I have no limits. Ok, technically everyone does, but I have put so many on myself for so many years that now, the world is at my fingertips. It always seemed cliche to me to do this “30 things to do before you turn 30” thing, but then I realized it was the motivation I needed to keep me going and push my own buttons. The LIST gives me the excuse to do the crazy things I have been putting off…and it’s just that, I never really had to put them off in the first place; I could have done any of these things I was just too afraid. So the list is going to help me be less afraid and see what the world has for me. There are no more limits and I’m allowed to do whatever I want, when I want, and how I want it. Who’s going to stop me but myself, right? So 29 will be the year without fear, the year that I let everything go and be the person I was meant to be.